August 11

Lena's a fruit loop. I think she's really lost it because we called Italy just to hear them say "Pronto" which means hello. I think she's had too much Italian on the brain. I met some men in St. P's from Rome. They really thought they were the shit. Pinno (Pinno spoke English) and Franko. What jerks. They come here because they thought they could get women easy, but they had more problems then they thought.

Women were not that easy. Whatever., Lena and I showed them around the city and we brought them home, which I thought was stupid, but I thought Lena wanted them and she thought I wanted them. I told Pinno about Andy all night and how much he loves me and how wonderful Andy is and Andy this and that, Andy, Andy, Andy.

He called Andy a saint and that was just the beginning of his attempt at seduction. He really thought I wouldn't be able to tell what he was doing, I think. When they came here I still think he thought he would at least kiss me, but I told him not to touch me and he respected that.

We slept in the same bed and heard Lena and Franko and he still made one more attempt and asked "I wonder what they are doing in there?" I didn't say anything but Franko left her sore, he didn't even bother to warm her up, what a jerk. Well, hopefully we can find her someone better back home.

Lena keeps calling Frank an old goat. Now, back to out regularly scheduled program. The first day in St. Petersburg was surreal. I didn't sleep well on the train because it was my first time and it was hard. I rode 2nd class and met a girl named Masha and she seemed nice enough until all she could talk about was money. How hard it was for her to live and her parents. Money this, money that, like I would have been the one person to save her from all her money problems. She talked about how much fun we would have blah blah blah and at first, I wanted to live at her parents house, but then Lena said "Astrozna" Attention please, so when she said that I knew it probably wasn't a good idea, so I stayed at the hostel and met people from Denmark, Hong Kong, England, Italy, America, and Brazil. It was interesting to say the least.

I started my day off at the hostel and then I saw Sean, so we made plans to go to the Peter and Paul fortress, and it was good. Even though I really didn't like him. I had to wait for him to get his shit together so I was spacy by the time he was ready. I wanted coffee, but he didn't so we went on the bus and I saw the city going up Nevsky Prospect. It was so surreal.

We stopped at the fortress and it was beautiful. I saw Catherine The Great's tomb, I met a man from Litchfield (I was admiring his little digital camera) and it was an even more pleasant day when I met this wonderful Australian that was a photographer photographing for a guidebook. She was the most amazing woman I met up there. We talked as we walked through the jail where the Decembrists were, including chicks. It was all in all a wonderful experience. She told me about her boyfriend in Paris, just cool stuff.

Then we went down to the "beach" which was strange, all these people laying out. It was pretty groovy, then I left, went back to the hostel and got lost on my way. Took photos of the Hermitage, St. Isaac's and found a bus to take me back to the hostel. I came into the hostel and there was Billy, the most beautiful American guy I've seen here. Long beautiful brown hair, perfect height, perfect gentleman, and an engineer. He was sweet. We went to eat at a pub together and then we went back to the hostel. This was Thursday.

August 12

On Friday I woke up and went on Peter's walking tour about Doestoesky. It was pleasant. I walked and walked and took many photos for Sydney. I started to get the runs (a hazard of St. P's) and we were in the middle of our tour where Raskolnikov lived. It was a bad place in Crime and Punishment and it still is a bad place today.

They tore down all the whore houses and now they are building an institute or something in their place. I was so tired that day, I went back to the hostel and took it easy and then my Dutch room mates and I were going to go to a "Georgian" cafe. I didn't think it was such a good idea, but I was starved so we left. I couldn't pronounce their names now if I wanted to. One was a red head and the other was a dark brunette.

When we got to the cafe it had a new name,there was a BMW outside and it was amazingly clean, so when we walked in it was "closed" so we left real fast and went to a Shitty Finnish restaurant trying to be like McDonalds that wouldn't give me both Curry and B-B-Que sauce for my nuggets. I couldn't even buy it, that girl was such a bitch. So we sat and ate and the Dutch girls told me about how they think America is a country of Extremists and I agree.

What started it was they asked if I smoked and I said I didn't but only sometimes. Then they commented on how strange it was for an American to sometimes smoke and off they went about Americans. So as I sat there, I started to listen to how they spoke of other countries blah blah blah and then it hit me. Now I understand why the feminist movement hasn't been so popular in Europe. It's because they all, all the countries are a nation of Nationalist. They are so busy competing against other European countries that they could never become united as women. It's just strange , that's all. So we went back to the hostel around 11 and it was still broad daylight.

The next day I took Peter's walking tour of Pushkin. It was a nice tour, reminded me of Crestwood a little. I took so many photos, I was going to buy a book but I photographed a lot. We went to the "second most beautiful park in Europe" and I thought it was just OK. I really didn't care for it. It was basically a big forest with ruins everywhere. We walked around the palace then went back to St. P's and Peter told me about how when Sean got a little tipsy, he spoke better Russian.

I was like, duh "haven't you ever slept with someone when you were wearing beer goggles?" and the first look he shot me was, "What is coming out of your mouth?" Then I realized that wasn't the look he gave me, he gave me the "of coarse I have," and then I realized that those are International Beer Goggles.

After I said this, I found myself strangely attracted to him. He was cute, smart, spoke good English, was also a photo or image maker and then I realized I better cool off his tours or I would have gone home with him.

This time, when I returned the the hostel I went to the grocery first and went upstairs to make some soup and that's when I met Andre and Enrica. They were the sweetest and nicest thing about St. P's. They made me spaghetti made by real Italians, I think I forgot to photograph them, but they were such a handsome couple, I could go on and on. Most of all, they were in love. They reminded me of Andy and me. So after I was exhausted from 2 days of Peter's boot camp, I decided I needed a rest, and it was wonderful to eat with the Italians so I offered them fried chicken the next night and they accepted.


So we begin with Sunday. Right now, I want to kill Lena. She is getting on my nerves. "Keep the door open," I want it closed. I fucking paid her, she can kiss my ass. I think she's being a Nazi Cunt Bitch because I'm leaving, I just don't understand.

So anyway, on Sunday I was tired I took it easy. All I really wanted to do was make fried chicken. I talked with Sean before he left, found out he was 3 of 4 as well. He was still a California flake. So he left and I went back up to my room to rest and enter Pascal the freak.

We started talking about our fathers. She didn't know how to tell me in English (she was German and we both spoke broken Russian and she spoke broken English) but she didn't have to, she kept talking and it all came out. I told her she needed to write all her feelings out and then she'd feel better, I didn't really do that much for her but listen to her recount tales of being molested. Then it was like we were joined at the hip, which really got on my nerves after oh, 6 hours.

She got me to go out so we tried to find Pizza Hut together but first we went to or rode the bus and saw St. P's which was pleasant. Then she started bothering me. We went to the grocery store, with a credit card machine, which was fucking up, not printing right, but it finally began to work. So we headed back to the hostel and I had to stop to buy chicken and flour because the supermarket didn't have it. So I began to make chicken and these Aussies were in the way and really being annoying but they left. My spuds weren't so bad because I put cream in them and the corn was pretty good too and the chicken was divine.

Pascal bought Coronas and it was cool. Then I went to bed, but not until after I listened to Pascal bitch about the Aussies for a half an hour.

The next day, Monday, all the museums were closed, so Pascal went to Peterhoff and she expected me to go, but I told her I wanted to photograph N. Prospect. So I started and got lost, ended up on this groovy metro stop and bought myself the pink Dali perfume. I jumped back on the bus, got off at the cemetery, photographed it, was heading towards the commoner's cemetery when I got hit up for money by an old lady. I shook my head No and walked around the back of the cemetery when some jerk cornered me and gave me some sob story after he tried to tell me about the cemetery and asked for money and I gave him about what was equal to $2, which he didn't seem to appreciate because I think he wanted the $10 he saw in the pocket of my purse (that $10 becomes VERY intragal in a minute), I was so disgusted I got back on the road to get on the bus when some jerk asked me the time then tried to sell me a pin. Then I hopped back on the bus and some gross bitch with rotten gold teeth eyed me for 10 minutes when she tried to talk to me and I couldn't understand one word she was saying. Her dialect was so strong and then she pointed to her breasts and I understood that she wanted money too. Then I said, yeah, well so does my mom (have cancer). She stood up at the next stop and got off. This is why I didn't like St. P's. I didn't like being viewed as a dollar sign, and it didn't go away. I felt many eyes preying on me after that, I just didn't like it so I think that's the main reason I hate it, plus I don't thing the Russians deserve the stuff they have. They sure as hell didn't take care of that city when they did have money because it's falling apart.

The Hermitage is a tragedy. If you were to run your fingernail down a painting, you would see how gross and grimy the city is because they leave the windows open. Some of the DiVinci's have natural light falling on them. I now think the trophy art should go back to Germany, since the Russians can't take care of what they have.

I ended my journey that day eating pizza "sticks" with the Italian couple and Pizza with Pascal All she did was bitch about how she forgot her umbrella and her jeans got wet so she was going to get sick. We had to move rooms that day so we got ready for bed. I think she wanted to actually take a bath with me, which was starting to freak me out. She was really getting on my nerves. I tried to ditch her for a while, but she kept finding me. I didn't try real hard, I'll put it that way. Then as we were lying down for bed, I looked outside and thought "how beautiful" and she must have been thinking the same because she asked if I wanted to go for a walk so we put our clothes back on and lef

August 15

So that night we went for a walk to the river and I saw what looked like the beginning of Aurora Borealis. I photographed it. It was so beautiful. Pascal wanted to walk around all night, but I wasn't keen on the idea. It ended up that as we were walking home, she bitched about how tired she was. We went to a supermarket and she was wanting to run in and out. She really got on my nerves.

But now I don't want to think of these things. All I want to think about is Andy. I'm on the plane coming home and I can't wait to fuck him. I keep wondering if when he touches me, will it feel like the first time or what will it be like? I feel scared and nervous, like I'll never get home. (I ended up staying in Atlanta that night because my plane was too late for the connection or something).

I think I'd like to come back to Moscow next year. I have met the most interesting people of my life, other Americans, Vlady and Liuda, and it's like my experiences don't quit ending.

It's 6 am and I'm thinking of you, Woobie. You just got off work and you're still dirty, smelling like diesel fuel and other noxious gases. You are taking out your contacts and thinking about me... I hope.

Why do I feel so attached to Lena? She was mean to me a lot, but I can't find it in myself to hate her. She has many flaws, but I truly hope to see her next year.

Now I think I can sleep.

First arriving

Love Canal
Peter and Paul Fortress

Catherine's tomb

Guys in Speedos
What a Bala!


Swan Fountain





Flood Wall







Nice ass


Broken Angel

Tchakovsky's Grave

Some Famous Ballerina

Some pretty Building

Another pretty one

Soldier's Grave

Priest in Purple robe

My walk at night

A park at night